Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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