are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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