My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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