new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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