I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
