I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
