are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
