none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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