Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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