Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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