God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
