Moan for me like Helen Keller
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize