how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
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