When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
