Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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