I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
that's an acceptable place to lick
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
