Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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