This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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