I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
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