Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
