Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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