what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
