I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize