I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn off my feet"
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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