i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize