if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I am spending my child support on dildos
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
