How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
