Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
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I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
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My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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