Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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