If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
You dont lie about slip and slides
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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