somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.