help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
