I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
