He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
