Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
