Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
