My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize