If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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