Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Couch. On fire.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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