So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
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I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
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Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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