i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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