I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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