Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
