Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels