where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
