U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize