Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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