I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just gift wrapped bread.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
