I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
