He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
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I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
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There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable