i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"