But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
