sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
and she was petting her beer can
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
