3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
two words...techno handjob
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
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